And Now for the: “What-the-Heck-Am-I-Doing-Here?” Phase

Oh, my poor blog has been suffering from such neglect; well they say no news is good news although I’ve never been partial to that saying myself. These past weeks have been something between a siesta and a flat out wog (walk/jog). Working only “twelve” hours a week means less occupational stress, but it also means that those questions I either went in search of or avoided by coming here (such as “what do I want to be when I grow up?”) have more opportunities to breach, puncturing the calm surface with their dorsal fins. “Why did I come here?” “Is my Spanish improving?” and “Am I being an effective teacher?” are three of the most frequently spotted members of the pod. Perhaps it’s the lack of distractions that leave me feeling fragmented (consequently, my recently acquired expenditures, i.e. car, plus my meagre salary, equal a decline in extra curricular activities that require monetary compensation). Luckily for me, I’m in such a beautiful place and I do have a car that, so as long as I can afford gas, distractions aren’t too hard to come by.
I’m always surprised by how American I am. Without the occupational stress to fuel me on, I’m not quite sure what to do. Create some I suppose. Having taken a back seat as a teacher in a system I fundamentally disagree with continues to be a challenge. I’m also impatient with myself and the rate at which my Spanish is improving. I’ve seen the language acquisition charts and I know that I’m at a plateau right now and the frustration I’m feeling is a precursor to great growth, blah, blah, blah, but it doesn’t stop me from feeling frustrated. After much reflection into why I’ve been feeling so raw these past weeks I’ve come to some conclusions. The first being that I still enjoy teaching (although I now know I greatly prefer adults) and that this experience has only consecrated my beliefs on teaching pedagogy. I can’t revolutionize their entire system, I can only offer ideas and that’s all the effort I’m willing to expend at the moment. I prefer to dedicate myself instead, to searching for additional employment. I’ve always wanted to get into translating but I’ve been hesitant, apprehensive that I my skills are not good enough. However, what I’ve realized is that there are a ton of English here, and only a handful actually speak Spanish, so there is definitely a market; I’ve just got to find a way in! By pursuing this goal, I’ll be forced to accelerate my Spanish and it’ll also cushion my budget some. I feel relieved having finally pinpointed what was bothering me, and to have a direction in which to focus my energy.
Aside from my mini crisis, I’ve actually been doing a lot of interesting and fun things. A couple of weeks ago I went to a flamenco concert and saw a very famous guitarist named Tomatito. I’ve also been checking out some of the beaches in the area which are spectacular and I can’t wait until the weather gets really nice (although I can’t complain, I did go sun bathing last weekend). I also went hiking through these boulders that were coated with gypsum, giving the landscape a dazzling, ethereal effect. There was a hippy community living there and one of the members, an English architect, had constructed various structures from the bamboo like canes that grow in the stream. They are something like a jungle gym and you could climb them like a monkey. Unfortunately, my precious weekend was marred by my third encounter with the law. The Guardia Civil pulled me over to do routine checks for documentation. I had with me my U.S. driver’s license, my international driver’s license and my insurance, but I’d left my proof of purchase and registration at home (stupid, stupid!). Alas, I got off with a small ticket, a “gift” according to the officer, but I have to go to the capital city to pay it. Doesn’t the officer get it that me trying to find my way through the city is punishment enough? Anyways, I’ve been wanting to go there again and I still haven’t seen the castle there. In short, that’s the summery of what I’ve been up to psychologically as well as physically these past few weeks. I hope you enjoy the photos, they are long overdue.